Poser!

When the snow really
falls, one can produce
snow forts, all gutted
from giant snow piles.
If one is not a giant pile
of snow, one doesn't
have to watch Cocktail
on TV. But not doing so
would be stupid
and pretty immature.
Besides, as a biologist,
I have obligations
to science that don't allow
me to change sides!
Freedom isn't free, Tina!

Telling the Truth

The Proper Direction Machine

A Note to Tina

No matter what anyone says,
you've got a beautiful way about you that
suggests something more better
than regular language. I was thinking
of assailing you with metaphorical examples
but instead decided on nothing. Thus,
we find ourselves in the midst of this,
perhaps bored or stunned dumb.
There is no other way of displaying this
to the world, but, believe me,
if I could make a billboard I would.
I would put it on your highway.
You would drive by and say, Ah.
It's like a Poison album, but different.

Songs for the New Short Hand Cd (Unfinished) and Other Stuff

Songs for the New Short Hand CD:

Death at Your Door
Jason Mathias
On My Skateboard
Certain Strangers
The Scary
Identical Things
Fort Lauder dale
Alive
Dry
Birth Control
Attila!
Little Girl
Alligator
All Is Right
Mohammad Ali
Family Van

Of course, all of this means nothing to you and only means small things to me. But today there was sledding. I was Michelangelo and he was Leonardo. We were also just "Good Guy" and "Evil Guy." I was Evil Guy. He kept going further and further. So much so I had to say, "Hey, I never thought you'd be getting so close to the river, but since you are, hey, seriously, when you're near the edge there, stop yourself. Just put down your legs and arms. You don't want to go in the river. We don't want to test that ice." And Monday is a holiday, so, we'll finish this Ben 10 book. Huh? You don't know Ben 10? Well, as far as Max is concerned, you should look it up.

Condiments, Major Requirments

Ketchup 101
Mustard 101
Mayonnaise 101
Dressings and Vinegar 101
Oils 101
Hummus, Salsa, Creams 220
Advanced Ketchup 220
Tomatoes and Herbs 230
BBQ 230
Preserves 210
Combinations I 220
Combinations II 320
Creams and Sauces 380
International Mashes I 385
Combinations III 420
International Mashes II 485

Phantom, Mystery, Yoda, and Mystery Bee Save the Day!

Memories

Your gymnastics coach was inconsolable.
I remember how you teased your hair
and dabbed your eyelid. Your poor blue
eyelid, all florescent with blue eyeshadow.
Your little fish belly eyelids aren't alit
for no reason. I remember times
when you seemed like a robot, all stiff
with certain noticeable side effects.
You know how to fold a table cloth, Tina.
Don't give me any shit.
You know how to fold a table cloth, Tina.
Even if we hadn't agreed to be
something else, we still would have ended
up all ourselves, etiquette-wise.

Super Good Stuff

Max wrote this note tonight. He has written his name horizontally in the upper righthand corner, and vertically, in reverse order, in the lower righthand corner. It reads: "MomDad / I Love You/ IHUHAGood / Day / XOXOX / OOOO / OOO / XXXX / OXOXOX"

He learned the XO=hugs and kisses from his teacher at school. The confusing word "IHUHAGood" is him sounding out the phrase "I hope you had a good."

Have you seen Robert Grenier's scrawl poems? This is good stuff, people. The world is beautiful, especially the kids.

Grafting Failures

I have never been good
at grafting the skin
from my own chest so as
to totally cover the burned legs.
But, within reason, you have
to admit that I've been hygienic.
Sure, you look terrific
and you move with
the sideways wind when
everyone assumes nothing
can move. But, Tina,
you understand stuff that is
deep down. When I was painting
my panorama for the contest,
I was thinking of you.
Even eating stew, Tina, you're
something special. I'm like
the broth is good, but I'm more
like, really, baby, you're so hot!

New TIGHT!

There's a new TIGHT with many cool poets. For instance, Jennifer L. Knox. Of course I have some poems in there too. You should get it. O, yeah!

X Marks the Tina

Of course, the rain affected
the situation, so much so that Tina
didn't even glance at the window.
The beauty of the whole thing
was that no one else could
see through anyway, so there we sat,
up to our navels in static.
I was touched by her sadness.
Even as we made love, I felt good
about everything she represented.
You know, Tina likes treasure maps
the way I like Tina.

The Stairs

The stairs were constructed in such a way
so as to emphasize the difference in height
between each individual platform. I was thinking
about that when I found myself face to face
with Tina. She was holding a jar of pickles.
I felt my inside body begin to levitate through
my outside body. I was, like, "Tina!" And
she was, like, nothing, and just stood there
all stone-faced and empty looking. At the table,
her parents sat lonely, with wet, begging
eyes. In a way, it was all sorta stupid.
I remember saying to Tina, and I'm saying this to you
now only because I know she'll probably say
something, but I was, like, "Tina, put your
fucking tape recorder away and just enjoy this!"

Seriously, Tina!

It's a football game and it's important
that one team beats the other team.
I don't care whether you understand.
I don't fucking care if you get it!
Get over yourself, Tina!
All these years, with your fucking friends,
and your exaggerated sense of self!
I don't know how your Schwan Man tolerated you.
I've met a ton of record store employees
and you're not even wearing denim.
Sure, all of us make errors,
but the way you prance around here is ridiculous.
Seriously, Tina, grow up! We're all
tired of your shit.

Tarpaulin Sky!

There's the new Tarpaulin Sky with 6 poems from me and lots of other cool poets like Sara Veglahn, Kristi Maxwell, Blake Butler, Jonah Winter, and Many Many More! I'm not saying you should get this just because it's the right thing to do, but I am saying that if you don't get this you may have some serious trouble in life. It's just a gut feeling I have.